Jew Face

A coworker and I are grabbing a beer when we meet a woman from Chicago. She says that she’s new to Los Angeles and doesn’t understand the culture. After chatting for a few minutes she says that she doesn’t like my face. So I tell her to have a good night and turn my back to her.

She taps my shoulder and asks what ethnicity I am, to which I respond that I’m white. She asks again and I say Jewish. Her eyes light up as she describes how she dated a Jewish man who turned out to be married and ever since then she hates Jews.

I tell her that’s ridiculous. She gets on top of her bar stool, on her knees, and continues yelling at me about how she doesn’t trust Jews.

The bartender breaks us up, asks her to leave, then serves my coworker and I another beer. He tells us that the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld is here tonight.

I turn to my coworker and say, “No soup for her!”